Archive for year: 2015

Throughout my day, I am expected to perform certain roles that are assigned to be by society based off of my identities. A few of my identities that either I have chosen, or were given to me, are: female, CI student, a white American, sister, daughter and roommate.

If we take my identity of “daughter” and put it through the cycle of socialization, the beginning would be me being born to my parents who have expectations of what a “good daughter” is supposed to be and gave me my name. An example of being born into an already socialized world as a daughter is the idea of being “daddy’s little girl,” and there are toys and signs and clothing being produced before a daughter enters the world.  The first socialization came from mostly my parents, along side other adults who were in my life at an early age the role of not only being someone’s child but a daughter. An example of that would be a memory of mine, where my grandmother told me that my mother was a good daughter because she was respectful and listened. Part of “training” as kids is learning and understanding the difference between good and bad, and that there are consequences to both. This subjective idea of good and bad heavily influences the socialization process. As a young child, I was given the title of daughter, but I wanted to earn the title of a “good” daughter. Eventually, the identity of daughter also meant being a sister. I think culturally, this idea of “daddy’s little girl” is pushed onto daughters at all ages. There are songs and traditions that encourage it. Reminder: I am claiming the identity of daughter, not “daddy’s little girl.” I am not saying that they are synonymous, but I am saying that society pushes daughters to identify with that phrase. The identity of being a daughter is enforced through privilege and rewards and punishments. I definitely think that because I was the only daughter out of three children, I have certain privileges but also pressures. I am encouraged to get married and pop out some grandkids, but I did/do get special attention from extended family because I am the only girl. The privileges are weird, I personally would like to ask those people why they treat me differently than my brothers, because I get the gender discriminations but I am curious about how numbers play into it. The result of the socialization leads to different pressures and expectations. I think this cycle when applied to the “daughter” identity, happens multiple times because our relationships with our parents are different at age 2, than at age 8, than at age 15, than at age 23, etc… so it’s almost like we have to socialize as we develop into our own selves and as our relationships evolve.

Thinking of six identities that I have on a day to day basis was much harder to think of then I had imagined. The six identities I could think of for myself was a student, where I have responsible on my academics such as studying doing all the homework, desk assistant, where I am have duties to help those who live on campus as well as help with projects around the office. Also, a friend where there are no real responsibilities but from time to time a friend needs help whether it be something personal or something as simple as homework, a sister and cousin, where I am a role  model not only to my siblings but my cousins since I am the oldest around them and first ever to attend college. Lastly being a social person, by that I mean saying hi and smiling at people it might help their day get a little better, I myself am still getting used to doing that since its more normal to do that type of stuff here then back home. The example I am going to use is being social. Being social is never really taught, for example when I was younger I was much more social then I am now and it wasn’t taught to me. I believe it comes naturally. In other ways it can be taught by family such as parents because they always say go say hi to so and so, also by teachers because working in groups there has to be some type of communication and it is learned even if it’s not the main purpose. Schools as well as church in a way force someone to be social. I have been in a position where I was forced to socialize at school when I didn’t want to as well as church. When I go to church they give a moment to shake people’s hands and if you don’t do it it’s considered rude. As a result of that I have become less social then I was before because I don’t like when something is forced upon me although I know it’s inevitable.  To change this I can look at it as an opportunity to meet more people not being forced to talk to people.

We are never just one thing. We never even really have one role ever. Everyone is a son, daughter, mother, father, teacher, friend, partner or something else to someone else. And in some ways these labels and parts of who we are make up our identity.  All of this is a good way to start to see the world, that each person is a sum of parts. However, many of these labels and identities people did not chose and have no control over. No one has a choice in black or white or Latino. It is all a chance of birth.  A persons identity and which parts they see as most important or relevant to themselves is mostly socialization. Within the study of social identity and the role of the world around us in shaping who we are, the cycle of socialization is a great way to understand how people make sense of who they are.

The best way to understand the cycle of socialization is with an example. My own identities are female, white, straight, hard of hearing, middle class, and student to name a few. Now most of these I had no choice on. Let’s take what it means to be female through the cycle of socialization.

First, I was born. Belated congrats to my parents! I came into this world not even really knowing I was female, let alone having the information about what it means to be a girl in the world.

Second, is first socialization from parents, teachers and mentors. This is shapes expectations and values that are important later in life. Personally, I was lucky in this department because my parents were raising all three of us girls to believe that we could be anything we wanted. I was lucky in my other main role model too-my girl scout leader Naomi. She encouraged skills and belief in all of her scouts.

Third is where the outside world (institutions and our culture) either reinforces or bombards people with messages. This is where being a girl ran into some challenges. Television and media, for example, were still telling the message that women were less than men or that there are certain ways to be a girl. Princesses get rescued. Girls can’t throw. Superheroes weren’t for girls.  Then there were different messages that girls should like clothes and shopping. (Personally, I only like shopping if its for books).

Forth, messages from the world are reinforced. In school rewards for guys were some times superhero stickers or something along those lines. The girls on the other hand got rainbow stickers or pink hearts for their stickers.  It was considered weird if you were a tomboy sometimes. Other kids in elementary thought I was strange sometimes, because like the boys in school I had a Pokémon field guide.

Fifth, is the negative result those messages and reinforcement can have. For me it resulted in silence. I was sometimes almost ashamed of my geeky nerdy side. I would still watch the shows in private, but I wouldn’t talk about them. It was more socially acceptable for guys to have those interests, not girls.

The sixths and final step of the cycle is a choice. You can either choose to accept the status quo and be a part of that message and system or you can challenge to change it.  For me I am taking a stand. Women can and do like science fiction and fantasy. We can and do like superheroes and anime. And the women in these media rescue men not the other way around.   In fact, women want more heroines and are lobbying for more female superheroes that get equal air time with the men.

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