CI forges strong relationships with the community. Several of our students focus their research on issues important to our region. Meet one of them: Cassandra Ludwig.
After participating in and reading about the importance of listening I can say that I haven’t been truly listening for most of my life. Hearing is usually what people are referring to when they talk about listening because we’ve made them synonymous. Hearing is the act of sound waves entering our ears, but listening is actually paying attention to what those vibrations in your ears mean. It is very easy to simply tune out and only hear a person speak, but when you want to having meaningful conversations or in our particular case give good advice, you need to not only hear, but listen. One of the most important things you can do to reassure some one that you are listening is to have eye contact. It shows that you are not distracted and giving your undivided attention to an individual, something I’ve always had problems with.
Of the 10 characteristics that are present in a helpful relationship I can say that I am best at communication and interaction, as well as designing to produce change. I feel that these characteristics come easy to me because I like talking to people and interacting with them in a way that makes our interactions meaningful as opposed to pointless. I feel that producing change comes easy to me because I like the idea of helping others to allow them to reach their full potential.
The characteristics I least felt comfortable with our showing clear structure and being a collaborative effort. The reason I feel I struggle in these areas are because I believe that relationships can lean to one side. I feel that relationships can sometimes become one sided and so it becomes difficult for them to be collaborative when one person is putting in more work. Similarly, because of this one sided nature of relationships it becomes hard for them to have a clear structure as one person might be saying or doing more than the other.
In order to better myself I need to remember that even though relationships can be one sided that I can balance them out and engage all involved. Once a relationship is balanced you can achieve a clear structure and both work together toward a common goal.
Its a good question. How many of us really listen to the conversations we have everyday? Are we really listening or are we just waiting for the break in the conversation to chime in with our own thoughts. And how much do we listen with more than our ears?
The activity I did in class of responding non-verbally was enlightening actually and I wish we could have done more than a single activity. In that exercise I did two things that I think could vastly improve my listening skills. When it was my turn to respond, since I could not speak I was not really thinking of anything to say. I just listened. I just heard the other person out. I realized it is not something I always do. The second thing I realized when I was speaking. I was paying closer attention to the body movements of the listener to get their reactions.
The traits of the helping relationship that I think are most natural to me would be demonstrating respect for individual self worth, mutual consent, and shows a clear structure. Even in my personality quiz fairness for other people, a large part of respect was one of the top traits. I think that I respect people, even those I disagree with. And in the other leadership positions that I have had, and are in now all those wanted to help and I wanted to help them. In those positions I also mostly had a clear structure. I was the cadet leading the brownies. Or in my new official position, I am a staff member that answers the student questions.
The parts of the helping that are presently harder for my position are a collaborative effort and seeks understanding and involvement. I can ingrate these better into my style though practice. By being part of a team and collaborating no more projects I will gain the experience that I need to become better in these areas. Part of these is also visualizing goals and then sharing that goal so practice in clear communication is a must. I also need to work on listening. That is a truly important part evey any really fanastic team. With understanding and involvement their is an aspect of building confidence. I am new to the position and I also have ideas and goals that I want to help people with but am unsure of how exactly to get there.
Cassandra Ludwig is a native of El Centro, California. Cassandra is currently working towards her degree in Bachelors of Arts in Sociology at CSU Channel Islands. Her plans are to be able to work in non-profit sectors that are involved with children while also getting an MBA with an emphasis in Non-Profits. Cassandra’s current research deals with the relationship between Ventura County Board of Supervisors and Ventura County Commission of Women, a nonprofit organization for women and girls. Cassandra has worked with Southwest Keys Program, a nonprofit that assists immigrant children, and the Salvation Army whom brings assistance to homeless people. She is interested in researching how non-profit organizations assist homeless children in the Ventura County community. In her free time, Cassandra highly enjoys cooking, making her own recipes, reading Shakespeare and learning more about marine life.
The characteristics that seem most natural to me is the one that deals with producing change and “understanding and involvement”. The reason why I believe these are what I am naturally strong at is because I am very analytical and it is easy to do so for me. The one characteristic I would say I need to practice more is making people feel more secure, because it is always difficult to get people to trust you and make them feel safe. How to incorporate these weaknesses is difficult. It will always be a challenge on how to make people feel safe. The most I can do, or anyone can do, is make sure that you have an open mind and greet them with open arms. After they are willing to come to you, you have to have an environment that says “I’m not here to judge you, I’m here to help you”. Once you have established both of those aspects you can start to make people feel secure and will have a greater chance of finding the root of their problem.
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